Sometimes we just don’t understand each other. We either do not clearly communicate what we are trying to say or the other person has just failed to really listen to hear. Those are what we might call misunderstandings. They are frustrating and can certainly lead to problems. But, sometimes it is more egregious than that. Sometimes husbands, wives, and friends use harsh words to get their points across. They “bite and devour” one another and end up consumed by frustration and even hatred (Galatians 5:15). Words, unfortunately, do much more damage than sticks and stones. While verbally throwing knives might be reserved for one’s home life, it can also extend into our work, play, and social media lives as well. We may become adept at piercing the hearts of all those within our circle with our cutting words. Social media has not helped much with that. A whole generation is growing up seeing people slander and bully people on social media. Once upon a time if you said the wrong thing to the wrong person you might walk away with a sore jaw. Today, you can say things that are way worse than anything I even considered saying growing up and there are no real consequences. We have become a very mean and frustrating society in general. We have become bold in our verbal knife assault. So what do we do to improve on this in our homes, in the church, and in our communities? One of the first things to understand is that you can only control you. I cannot prevent others from throwing knives at me but I can certainly abstain from throwing at other people. Paul encouraged the early church in Rome to be at peace with others in as much as it depended upon them (Romans 12:18). To control what I say to others I first may need to have heart surgery. I’m not talking about a physical open-heart surgery—I’m talking about a spiritual change of heart. So long as my heart is filled with frustration and anger and bitterness then I will likely be relaying those feelings in my communication and what I don’t intend to be knives might very well be perceived as such. In this case, perception means more than reality. If I am in a dark place and feel threatened, a toy knife will not be perceived as a toy. It will be seen as a weapon of destruction and I will manage the situation as such. When people are in dark emotional places, feeling threatened, the words you wield may very well appear to be destructive and bitter if not seasoned with a great deal of salt (Col. 4:6). Lastly, learn to replace the negativity with positive thoughts, words, and actions. The recently cleaned out residence will become inhabited by every rodent imaginable if left completely empty. Jesus spoke of a similar truth as it applied to personal demons — the cleaned out residence will soon find it is in worse shape than it was before (Matthew 12:43-45). So, learn to engage in positive behavior and replace your words with encouraging words (Ephesians 4:29). So, take control of your words and stop throwing knives. Look at your heart and begin the healing process deep within. Do what you can to eliminate the hate and anger you have for the person you are dealing with. But don’t forget to replace the negativity with something positive. Speak life and love into the people around you. Look for opportunities to strengthen. Your relationships will thank you!